Spring 2020

It’s June. How is it June? I am completely stuck back in March. Months have passed, and for me most of the time it only feels like days. But some days, like today, it feels like years.

When 2020 started, I had everything planned out. I wanted to be done writing Spring by the end of March or April. Definitely by June. Worst case by June. If all was going really well, I had visions of being done with my first edits by now. I thought I’d start writing a part of Reed and Emma’s story, then finish up completely with all of the edits for Jenks and Liv. I had a plan.

But?

Remember a few sentences ago when I said I was stuck back in March?

March came and I was nowhere near where I needed to be. And that was before. Before getting REALLY sick for weeks and weeks. Before numerous meds that knocked me on my ass even worse at times than the illness from hell. Seriously. It was before getting sick AGAIN and going to numerous doctors AGAIN – this time for a few ultrasounds, more bloodwork, more freaking tests, more poking and prodding, before the news that I would have to see even more specialists. Because why not? It was before putting me on fancy meds that come with not only some scary warning labels on the bottle but special warnings from my doctor about what to do, what not to do, and a whole bunch of other stuff that has me questioning absolutely everything. Yay me.

It was BEFORE one of my cats – the one who lives solely on the third floor where my writing room is, the one I spend hours and hours and hours a day in (when I’m not super sick in bed and all that) – was diagnosed with cancer. My cat that I love beyond all reason – the one I spend about 80 % of my day with – was diagnosed with cancer a few days ago. As if being dumped by her previous owners at around 12-13 years of age, while being blind in one eye, already suffering from thyroid and kidney disease, declawed and arthritic wasn’t bad enough, now this. She has to go through THIS. The sweetest cat I’ve ever known – and now this.

So yeah, it was March, I was already behind, and it was before ALL of this happened.

But you know, I still had hope then. I was behind, but so what? I’d write, write, write, and make up for it. I’d get back on track. No big. I mean, I WAS writing. I did all my edits of what I previously wrote in the beginning of March, (over 100 pages) and then I sat down and I DID write, I was excited, everything was full steam ahead.

But then I got sick on March freaking twentieth.

I stopped writing.

I tried my best to get back to it, even with a foggy brain and through the pain.

But it was slow, and not at all the same.

And now Allie is sick. Allie is freaking sick with cancer.

And I just realized, that if I wasn’t before with all of MY shit, I definitely am now. I am SO fucking over 2020 and everything it’s thrown my way.

My plans? Pretty much ruined.

Because life right.

And karma.

The Universe.

What the fuck ever.

So … March. I feel like I am still stuck there. And some days I actually wish I was. Because then I’d still have hope I’d get back to my writing and could actually be done with the whole story by June. Or even April. Wasn’t it April when I posted about how I was sick, but I started writing again, and I had hope I’d make up for it and yay I can’t wait for the weeks ahead? Yeah I am pretty sure I wrote that shit then. So March? April? I’d take either one. Because then I wouldn’t have a clue that it would actually take me damn near close to two months to write a chapter and a half. I’d have some hope that I’d actually be getting physically better and that I would stay that way, and that my body wouldn’t keep screwing me over like this.

And I’d still think my cat would be here forever. (Yes, I know her age. All her previous ailments. I KNOW. But I just wasn’t and am NOT ready. I KNOW, but I don’t want to actually know, because it just fucking hurts. It really, really hurts.)

But anyway, it’s not March. All this shit DID happen. And it’s June.

I have teasers lined up for weeks. I have a cover complete and ready to reveal. Hell, I have covers and book descriptions for Summer and Fall too. Just waiting for their turn. Their time.

But it’s supposed to be Livvie and Jenks’s time. Like now. Right now.

I should be done with their story. The only thing needing to be done is the tweaking, the polishing.

But what DO I have?

I have so many notes and scenes and chunks of chapters written for Livvie and Jenks for Spring just sitting here – notes, scenes, and chapters that still need to be written into the story/connected to the whole… and that’s the problem. I need to actually WRITE. I need to connect all these pieces I have to make the giant story come together … and it’s just not happening. Not how it needs to. Not how I want it to. And it hasn’t for months.

You know what’s coming together perfectly though? All this other ugly shit in my personal life that is wreaking all this havoc on the life where I get to live out my dreams as Tara Sosa, Author.

I envy the people who can compartmentalize and not let the personal bleed onto the professional. Because I sure as shit can’t do that. Actually, sometimes for my writing it turns out to be a good thing. Some of the best scenes I’ve written (*according to me anyway*) have come flowing out of me when I’m going through certain things … but between my sicknesses over the past few months and now Allie’s – I honestly feel like I can’t function.

For MONTHS I’ve felt like I can’t function properly, but this is some new level type of shit. But I am trying. I’m trying my damnedest over here. And I will continue to keep on trying. I hope it doesn’t take me months to write my next chapter. But if it does, it does. And I have to be okay with that. I have to try and find a way to be okay with that. And I am hoping all of you will be too.

The beginning of 2020 – hell, even in 2019 – I said that Spring would be out this year. And I still intend on trying to make good on what I said. It’s June. There’s still 6 months left. A whole half of a year. But I know what happened during the beginning half – I KNOW better than to say anything will get better. Because life. Karma. The Universe. What the fuck ever. I just know better than to say those words out into the universe because that shit will surely come right back around and take another bite out of me. In some way, shape, or form.

So, I’m keeping with I will try my hardest to get Liv and Jenks and their story into your hands by the end of this year. As of right now, where I left off, my characters are doing fun and interesting things. I know the direction they’re heading in and right now what’s in my headspace is not on par with where I need to be to write what I want to write for them. They are getting some happy in their lives right now and honestly? Right now? I’m just fucking sad, hurt, pissed, doubting, and downright scarily hateful sometimes. Not a good combo. Maybe if I was at a different part of Jenks and Liv’s story … this shit would be awesome fuel. Like SO awesome. Their story at times is dark, twisty, not at all what they want or need. But right now, where I left off? Not so much. They DEFINITELY want what’s happening to them.

Unlike me.

But I’m hoping it gets better.

I am hoping I get better.

I really, really want Allie to get better too … but yeah.

Anyway … I hate feeling like I’m letting you guys down by pushing my timeline back. And I hope you don’t hate me for it. I hope you don’t give up on me. Because I’m not giving up over here. Not on Jenks and Liv. Not on myself.

I just need more time. Because life and all its unexpected and unwanted happened to me. I know it’s not the end of the world. Trust me. I know a lot of other people are facing far worse, going through rougher things, dire things, I know. But for me, right now, it seems like the end of the world. And I have to deal with my own shit in my own way. And telling you guys that I’m struggling over here to get Liv and Jenks to you, is the first step. Letting it be known that I need more time actually makes me feel a bit better. Because feeling like crap, and then getting punched in the gut, and the heart, thanks to the news about Allie, mixed in with the added extra anxiety over not being able to keep up with my writing and where I need to be and being scared to tell all of you because as an avid reader I KNOW what that feels like when some of the authors I read end up saying that they need more time and their books get pushed that I’ve been waiting and waiting to read like crazy – I HATED that I had to say that and do that to all of you … But I did. I had to. And it’s out there now. And I do actually feel like I can breathe a smidge easier. I hate that I had to tell you about me being sick. I hate that I had to tell you that Allie is sick. REALLY hate. But I didn’t want you to think that I’m pushing Livvie and Jenks’s book back because I’ve been – I don’t know, having a good time somehow in the midst of a pandemic, social distancing, and everything else going on in the country right now?

I don’t know. Okay?

I just didn’t want you thinking I was pushing the book because I didn’t want to write their story or that I didn’t care that even just one of you out there is actually waiting for their book and I decided other stupid things were more important.

Will I have days when I don’t write because I am out having a good time – I HOPE so! Will I have days when I don’t write because all I want to do is read someone else’s words all day to get out of my head? I HOPE so too – because I haven’t even been reading that much lately. Will I have days when I don’t write because all I want to do is hang out with Allie and soak up as much time with her as I can? YES. 100% yes. And I am NOT and won’t be sorry for that. That is one thing I won’t be sorry about.

I want you all to know that I will be trying to write every day. When you see me post teasers with hashtags that say comingsoon, know that I am trying my very best to make that whole comingsoon be this year. Know that I will be using that hashtag as motivation. Because honestly? Over the past few months, weeks, and over the last few days especially, I’ve been lacking that along with a lot of other things – things that have been replaced by other things that are dark, ugly, and sometimes debilitating.

But I said it before, and I will again … I hope things … ALL the things get better.

And I will be trying my damnedest every day to be a part of making that happen.

And this is the first step.

Letting you know that I am struggling … that I am sorry about it … but I am trying.

And always will.

2020 you’ve really sucked so far. But I still have hope that you’ll end up producing some magic!

Please.

Pretty please!

For me & everyone else!

Until next time – happy reading, stay safe, and just take a moment to enjoy all the little things!

Tara

2020 & all things Spring!

“To finish, I had to start …”

It’s funny how that’s the quote I’m going to be using this week for the teaser I post on my Twitter, Instagram, and author Facebook accounts. Because it couldn’t be more fitting. To finish Jenks and Livvie’s story, I have to start writing from where I left off last year. Over the past few weeks I’ve edited here and there, I’ve written more dialogue and scenes for them, I wrote a huge portion of an epilogue that I can’t wait to complete and share with you, I also wrote a few pages from where I left off last, but I’m talking about diving in deep and writing until I can finally type The End. And then start writing the book that I know is going to gut me so I can give you a sneak peek of the next book in the series at the end of Spring. There’s always one book in a series that does it. Changed Beauty was the one that did it to me in the Beauty Series. Emma and Reed’s story, Summer, will be the one that shreds me to pieces emotionally in this one. That doesn’t mean that Jenks and Livvie and Knox and Rina won’t have me shedding tears, pulling out my hair, have my husband looking at me like he doesn’t know who I am or what the hell happened to me, or if he should talk to me, hug me, ignore me, breathe – but it’s going to be a whole different level with them … I’ve already shed tears while writing about them in Winter and the material I’ve compiled over the last two years since I’ve known that I’d be writing about them (some that I’ve written already for Spring too) – and I’ve wanted to change their story a million times just to not put myself or them through the drama, the chaos, the hurt, and all the ugliness that is their past, but it has to happen. It will happen.

Just like Jenks and Livvie will happen. Starting now.

To finish, I have to start. Which means I am now diving back into the dark and twisty … and the surprising. Jenks and Livvie are the two main characters I’ve known the longest in this series – (try figuring that one out – *I said twisty and surprising*) – and yet they are also the couple I have the least amount of material to work with. Normally I have a mountain of scenes, portions of chapters, even whole chapters to connect together to make a complete story. By now I should have an extremely detailed outline for the whole rest of the story. The whole thing. But not for these two. I only have the next few chapters. So, not only are they a surprise to each other – they are more of a surprise to me than I thought they would be.

Anyway …  So, like I said, I am starting today from where I left off before. YAY! That’s the “yay.” Now on to the opposite of that. Last year, I said that I planned on having Spring published in the Spring. This year I’ll be over-the-moon if I’m finished writing it by the end of Spring. I’m saying this because I only have a little over a hundred pages currently written, which means I have about 300-350 more pages to write (based upon the average page count before edits of my previous books) before it’s complete and goes through the first of three-four rounds of edits. Good thing though? I already have a cover. I already have the book’s description (as well as those for Summer and Fall). At least I’m ahead in some areas! And who knows – Unexpected Beauty only took me a month to write once I truly got started. And between that and Chaotic Beauty and all of their collective edits? Both were out in less than six months of each other. So it might happen! But it also might not. So just a heads-up that it might be a maybe-not to a Spring release. But a definite to one in 2020. I should add that this is barring a major meltdown, a catastrophe, huge (and I mean huge) distractions … and I’m not listing anything else because I am a big believer in the whole jinxing thing. Seriously. A firm believer in it. And I know I shouldn’t say definite because I was also the one who said at the end of 2018 or the beginning of 2019 that Winter and Spring should both be out in one year and now look at me! Taking all those words back. Which I hate. Saying things like that and then not being able to back those words up adds all this stress, and worry, and disappointment, and frustration, feeling like a failure … and I’m supposed to be writing a book, hopefully a damn good book, so I don’t need all of those trash feelings on top of it getting in the way like they have been … which is why I’m already behind. But I need to let it go and move on, which is why I am telling all of you that the release might not happen as soon as you’d like, please don’t hate me, I’ll still have a lot of teasers, and excerpts, and if you follow me on Twitter you’ll know daily how my writings going so you won’t have to wait until I do my blog every few months! I know, I’m horrible!

So, anyway, Spring will be in 2020. Summer and Fall who knows. But I will be writing them!

And yeah, enough of all that.

And enough of this type of writing. I need to go and immerse myself in all things Livvie and Jenks, and also Jax and Sky, Reed and Emma, Knox and Rina, and who knows – maybe Liam and Sam, Connor and Riley, Allie and Aiden, Ryan and Beth? A few new people? I guess you’ll just have to wait and see!

Until next time! Happy Reading!

(Side note: I am seriously going to miss the amount of reading I normally do when I’m not locked away in my writing room creating my own stories! 2019 had me reading only 92 books! 92! Normally I read between 100-150 a year. 2019 was not a good reading year for me! I hope 2020 is a lot better in terms of reading … and writing!)

While you are reading though, or doing whatever it is you do – I’ll be over here writing! (Sooner I write, the sooner I read! So … win-win!)

Tara

11.11.19 Winter’s Release

11.11 is a day where I’ll be wishing for all the things. And a day that I already know at least one wish will most definitely come true. It’s the day that Winter will finally be released into the world!

It has been a long time coming. Nobody knows that better than me.

A little over two years ago I fell in LOVE with Jackson Raines. I’m hoping that in a few weeks you will too.

Jackson Raines was a character that was never supposed to exist. His book was never supposed to happen. I’ve said all of this a few times now – most recently in the Author’s Note I wrote in the back of Winter – but I am saying it again here. Because it’s important. I was done playing in the world of Liam and Samantha, Connor and Riley, Aiden and Allie, Ryan and Beth. I was done. Finished. Hell, I was done with writing series books altogether. It would never happen again. All the connections and details you had to remember and get right throughout all the books. The secondary characters that take over sometimes that have you wanting to push one story aside to write another because they were pulling at you. And in all different directions. All of it. I was done. Jax wasn’t happening. He and his friends weren’t going to be anything more than stories in my head. The spinoff book? No. The series? No. All the connections? The twists? The turns? The surprises? The upside-downs? The reappearances of all the characters that I love so much and that are a very real part of me? No. Just no. No Jax. No Sky. And definitely no Jenks, Livvie, Reed, Emma, Knox, or Rina. No new setting of Inked like Mollys or The Brew. No new first loves, second chances, broken-hearts or happily-ever-afters set in the same time and place as the characters I was finally ready to let go of. No. No. No. No. No.

But Jackson Raines said YES. And then I did too. Because I mean … Jackson Raines.

One day when I was trying to finish Ryan and Beth’s story, which is book four in the Beauty Series, I had a scene I was trying to work through so I could write the chapters after that one specific part. I needed Beth to go and complete one of the “firsts” on her list – so I could get to one of my favorite parts of the story. And I really, really wanted to write that part of the story. I just needed her to get her tattoo so I could move on. It was supposed to be a quick in and out. But then I was writing about Ryan knowing this character – he was a close friend, he knew Ryan since high-school so he knew things about him that he could tell Beth and tease Ryan, he was gorgeous and flirty which would mess with Ryan too as an added bonus – and I was writing and writing and before I knew it I was opening a new document and writing this sexy-as-sin, dimples-for-days, eyes-the-color-of-winters-chaos, rips-and-holes, blacks-and-grays, tattoos-and-piercings type character who completely stole my heart and mind. And the next few years of my life. Because along with him came a full story. And friends that would map out the next three books after. A freaking series.

A new series.

What started as me leaving my writing room because of some chaos going on around me and not being able to concentrate anymore … yeah … it turned into me not concentrating on Beth and Ryan for a while because I was concentrating on Jax. And who he was. Who he’d fall for. What her story would be. His friends. Who I could pair them up with. What were their stories. And all the surprise little connections between all the characters. Beauty Series and Seasons Series characters.

Within days it wasn’t just Jax’s story that was mapped out and set. It was all of them. 4 books. I had characters, plot-lines, and even scenes written for four books. A freaking series. And I couldn’t wait to dive in. Even though I said another series = NO.

But I did dive in.
And now Jax’s story is complete.
A little over two years later.
TWO. YEARS.

As I said … Within a day I had his whole story mapped out. Within the next few I had a whole series. I don’t know how it all happened. But I had a Jax and Sky, a Jenks and Livvie, a Reed and Emma, a Knox and Rina, and in some ways they all had ties to a character or a couple from the series I thought I was done with.

I had all these new stories, a new dynamic, and so many words that I wrote down in that first day and then the weeks, months and years (because it’s been two years already!) that followed – words that killed me and made me love love and always and forever all the more. In the moment when I had to leave my writing room I was beyond mad. And now I have a brand-new story to give all of you. Brand-new stories! And I am the happiest I’ve ever been with my writing. I LOVE Jax and Sky. But I also really, really, really love all these new characters (and old characters that are finally getting their stories like Jenks and Livvie). I am also REALLY loving the glimpses into the lives of the characters I was supposed to leave behind – seeing them in the future with their families and the new paths they’re on.

Winter has a few appearances by some of our favorites.
And Spring? Spring has even more!

And I would know because *surprise* I am more than a third of the way done with Spring! I have over 100 pages written – and so many notes and scenes piled up that will take me through the rest of the book.

And I would LOVE to tell you more about Spring right now – but this is supposed to be about Winter and it’s finally being done and released into the world … but maybe soon I’ll post an exclusive excerpt of the first chapter. And what a chapter. Like nothing I’ve ever written. Sort of like Winter.

I’m finding it that this whole new series is like nothing I’ve ever written and that’s a GREAT thing!

But for now, I’m going to leave you with … Winter comes out 11.11.19. Spring comes out Spring 2020. Teasers are on the front page of my website … click them in the slider to see them all in detail. An exclusive excerpt of Winter is on the excerpts page (Seasons Series). I’ve updated the FAQ and the FUN Facts and pretty much everything else on my page. Twitter and Instagram and FB are my go-to – especially Twitter … so check it out.

And also? I lied.

I’m going to post the exclusive excerpt of Spring over on that page now too.
SOOOOOOO enjoy that as well! (*It will be posted below the teaser for Winter because it might be slightly spoilerish – see what I wrote below*).

Once you read Winter it will give you a whole hell of a lot more context to what you’re reading in the Spring except (such as characters and a *surprise* or two even from that first chapter) … so you might want to wait until after Winter’s been read. Cause it is spoilerish!!! You’ve been warned!!!!!!!!!

So yeah.
I think that’s it.

I hope you pick up Winter and if you do, I hope you love Jax and Sky as much as I do … and I hope you love their friends and want to read their stories too!

Hopefully it won’t be a bazillion years before you can!

Anyway … that’s it from me for now.

Until next time!

Happy Reading Everyone!

Tara

 

 

… 2019 & All the Books

2018 … 2019

ALL THINGS JAX AND SKY

(& Jenks & Livvie, Reed & Emma, Knox & Rina)

[AND MY INABILITY TO KEEP SOME PROMISES]

***** I must start out by saying – I am sorry. I am sorry that I have not kept up with you. I am sorry that I will be editing into and using most of my previous blog post because almost nothing has changed, and most of all I am sorry because 2018 will not be the year that Winter  (Jax & Sky’s story)is published like I had hoped. *****

 

***** I must also add that while the above is true, I edited this blog a few weeks ago – since then my tears of frustration are gone and I have found my way (you will know what I mean after you read the post below!!) Jax and Sky’s story will still not be published in the next few weeks – but I don’t think it will be more than a few months until their story is in your hands! And that includes edits being done too!!! So NO more tears over here – just smiles that I am finally writing, writing, writing (I still don’t know what happened – what came over me to get me to write like this and have everything connect itself and all that awesome good stuff, but I am going with it and enjoying it soooo … yay!!!!!  (but still – read my post anyway ) *****

 

So here it goes …

I did say numerous times that it wouldn’t take me months to write my next blog post … and yet it’s been months.

Many, many, many months.

I would love to say that’s because I’ve been busy writing Jax and Sky’s story – and I do have about a quarter of their story written (A bit more pages than the last time I checked in) – but it’s me. I don’t know what my problem is. (I honestly have no clue!)

I am so excited and in love with the story I have in my head for Jax and Sky. And also for Jenks and Livvie, Reed and Emma, Knox and Rina. (I am in even more love with them after writing down numerous scenes and chapters and even more twists and turns – not just for the first book, but for books two, three, and four!) I can still remember the dance I did around the house when these characters came out of nowhere – where their beginnings, middles, and ends became so clear, one thought after another, idea after idea, when all the twists and turns and the surprise connections just screamed at me … I remember laughing like a loon and having a smile on my face for the whole day. Because that’s when it happened. In one day. Jax and Sky immediately had their story mapped out in my head. And then over the next few days I thought about the first chapter I wrote of their story right in the middle of finishing my final book in the Beauty Series – and then bam! I had the next book, and the next, and the next.

And just thinking of what I thought then, and all the thoughts I’ve had after (all the one-liners, the back and forth dialogue, the chapters I have written, the outlines, the connections – all of it) I still have a smile … and I could probably run around like a loon for hours. (Seriously.! I do have a smile. And I have been known to get lost in conversations about these characters, the books, the ideas for hours at a time. I love these characters and all their drama … but all of the ideas, the already written chapters, scenes, one-liners, all the stuff for the other books after Jax and Sky … it’s just not enough!)

And because it’s not enough … Though I can laugh like a loon, and smile forever when I think about what’s going on inside of my head in regards to all things Jax, Sky, Reed, Emma, Jenks, Livvie, Knox, and Rina …  

I’m not going to.

Because there is another side to all of this as well.

I briefly touched upon it …

Getting all these ideas, all these stories out of my head and into a book … it’s HARD.

HARD!

I didn’t have this problem with Unexpected Beauty, Chaotic Beauty, Changed Beauty, or Unbreakable Beauty. I might have thought I did. But I didn’t.

Not even close.

It’s like I am almost afraid to write their story completely because I am afraid the magic of them in my head won’t transcend to what I write down on paper. Does that even make sense?

This story I have planned out for them – for ALL of them – I am doubting I can even do them justice! And they’re my characters. My people. My creation. Is it too cheesy to say that I feel like they’ve become a part of my soul?  

I think THAT’S my problem.

I am doubting.

And I shouldn’t be.

I should have this amazing confidence to tell this story – these stories.

It’s not like I’ve never written before.

This will be my fifth book I am putting into publication.

It’s not my first series.

It is not even the millionth or billionth story I have created in my head in the last 34 years (ugh… almost 35!!!) of living. (Seriously, the stories I have created throughout the years … That number reference definitely might not be a joke!)

It’s not my first time having doubts, fears, all of the emotions I am feeling right now.

But I am doubting everything.

Every. Single. Thing.

Maybe it’s because it’s the first time I am writing a story like the one I have mapped out in my head?

Maybe it’s because these characters are so different than Liam and Sam, Riley and Connor, Allie and Aiden, Beth and Ryan?

Maybe it’s because I am completely starting over with nothing to rely on except myself and my brain and my heart and soul that breathes for this, and I don’t want to crush any of it because all of this means the world?

Too much again?

Too over the top?

Probably.

But it’s still there.

It’s still the truth.

My truth.

Some serious pressure and stuff, huh?

And it is one hundred percent all coming from me.

And it sucks.

I don’t want to get it wrong.

Because I feel like this book – and the next three after it – can be amazing.

A-M-A-Z-I-N-G

I want to be able to say they WILL be amazing!

They ARE amazing!!!!

I want and need to say that, because these characters, their love stories, they are amazing … and I want you, the readers, to feel that way right along with me.

You deserve the story that is in my head, my heart … YES, the story that is in my freaking soul!

You deserve to read that story, to be a part of it, to live it. And hopefully love it!

And my characters deserve it too.

I deserve it.

So, OBVIOUSLY, this book is taking me a lot longer to write than I imagined. A lot longer than any of my previous books. I had hoped that it would be out living and breathing in the world by late Spring, early Summer (of 20-freaking-18) … and now …  (ummmm yeahhhh not happy over here … because that draft isn’t done. It is almost the end of the year and it isn’t done. SO WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU???)

Then comes the edits, edits, and more edits. So an approximate date? I’m not sure.

Because it’s already DECEMBER, I can’t keep my promises, I can’t seem to get all of my stuff together and write, write, write … soooo

And I mean … LIFE. Life happens too.

Life gets all up in the damn way sometimes. (I mean – Colleen Hoover’s Slammed reference right there people – which tells you, unlike writing I have been reading, reading, reading … currently reading my 104th book of the year and still a few weeks to go …)

But yeah … Life gets all up in the way especially when you finally think you have things figured out and can actually do this shit!

So life, in the damn way, happens too.  Always. And just because.

Sooooo …

2018? Nope.

2019?

THAT IS ACTUALLY A PROMISE I CAN KEEP!!!

A PROMISE I WILL KEEP!!!

I DO have a cover and have had that for a long time now … so there is THAT.

I have a Jax and a Sky.

I have a Jenks and a Livvie.

I have a Reed and an Emma.

I have a Knox and a Rina/Cat.

I have more than a hundred and thirty pages written.

I have at least a hundred more in notes and various materials just sitting around waiting to be connected.

I also have tons of material for ALL the books. That’s something. Because when I finally get everything together – mostly myself – I am hoping that it just flows like it normally does.

But for right now, with tears in my eyes (seriously … stupid freaking tears … no matter how much ha-ha I tried to throw in there during my edits of this blog, or sarcasm aimed at myself and everything else, or any other thing that shouldn’t bring tears … there are tears. Because I promised things, and I broke my promises. To myself. To you. And I haven’t been writing … and everything just sucks) …  & I need to say that I am sorry. AGAIN.

Sorry for delaying this book.

Sorry for taking so long writing it.

Sorry for all this doubt shit.

Sorry for rambling on and on and on and on and on and on.

But I need Jax and Sky’s story to be the BEST that it can be. And I need you all to KNOW that.

Like I said … YOU deserve it, I deserve it, JAX, SKY, JENKS, LIVVIE, REED, EMMA, KNOX, & RINA deserve it.

I will try and keep you posted a lot more than I have about this book and how it’s going. More than I ever have for any of the other books. Because you definitely deserve that. (This is another thing I said before and didn’t do. I will do better. I will be thinking up something fun to post in the teasers/excerpt section soon! Whether it’s a continuation of Chapter One  (so maybe a few new chapters since you’ve all waited long enough and dealt with all of my shit) … or maybe some teasers from this book and the ones after … I’ll have to figure it out!)

If you haven’t read Chapter One yet of Jax and Sky’s story it’s over in the teasers/excerpt page. And like I said above … unlike the other books where I waited until I was almost done or completely done with writing before I started releasing teasers, I am going to start doing that now (soon-ish) as well. A little something for bearing with me through all of this. A little something to show you that Jax and Sky are worth that wait … AND MAYBE I will throw in some teasers of the other couples and their books as well. Because like I said … I have a LOT of material for all of the rest of the books!! I just need to find stuff that isn’t too spoilery!!!

I need to tell you that I am so thankful for you guys and the love you have shown me and my books.

I hope you continue to do so with this next series.

Seriously … these characters and their stories – they are SO worth it.

And I hope more than anything that you’ll be finding out for yourselves soon.

I mean … 2019 is right around the corner!!

Until then enjoy the sneak peek of Jax and Sky’s story … and keep checking back here or on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook for all the new teasers I will be releasing soon-ish!

Happy Reading Everyone!

Tara

 

 

WINTER … JAX & SKY

ALL THINGS JAX AND SKY 

(& Jenks & Livvie, Reed & Emma, Knox & Rina)

***Also an exclusive sneak peak of Chapter One of Jax & Sky’s story, Winter (Book One of the Seasons Series) over in the Excerpt Page***

I did say it wouldn’t take me months to write my next blog post … and yet it’s been months.

Many, many, many months.

I would love to say that’s because I’ve been busy writing Jax and Sky’s story – and I do have about a quarter of their story written – but it’s me. I don’t know what my problem is.

I am so excited and in love with the story I have in my head for Jax and Sky. And also for Jenks and Livvie, Reed and Emma, Knox and Rina. I can still remember the dance I did around the house when these characters came out of nowhere – where their beginnings, middles, and ends became so clear, one thoughts after another, idea after idea, when all the twists and turns and the surprise connections just screamed at me … I remember laughing like a loon and having a smile on my face for the whole day. Because that’s when it happened. In one day. Jax and Sky immediately had their story mapped out in my head. And then over the next few days I thought about the first chapter I wrote of their story right in the middle of finishing my final book in the Beauty Series – and then bam! I had the next book, and the next, and the next.

And just thinking of what I thought then, and all the thoughts I’ve had after (all the one-liners, the back and forth dialogue, the chapters I have written, the outlines, the connections – all of it) I still have a smile … and I could probably run around like a loon for hours.

But I’m not going to.

Because there is another side to all of this as well.

Getting all these ideas, all these stories out of my head and into a book … it’s HARD.

HARD!

I didn’t have this problem with Unexpected Beauty, Chaotic Beauty, Changed Beauty, or Unbreakable Beauty. I might have thought I did. But I didn’t.

Not even close.

It’s like I am almost afraid to write their story completely because I am afraid the magic of them in my head won’t transcend to what I write down on paper. Does that even make sense?

This story I have planned out for them – for ALL of them – I am doubting I can even do them justice. And they’re my characters. My people. My creation.

I think THAT’S my problem.

I am doubting.

And I shouldn’t be.

I should have this amazing confidence to tell this story – these stories.

It’s not like I’ve never written before.

This will be my fifth book I am putting into publication.

It’s not my first series.

It is not even the millionth or billionth story I have created in my head in the last 34 years of living. (Seriously, the stories I have created throughout the years … That number reference definitely might not be a joke!)

It’s not my first time having doubts, fears, all of the emotions I am feeling right now.

But I am doubting everything.

Every. Single. Thing.

Maybe it’s because it’s the first time I am writing a story like the one I have mapped out in my head?

Maybe it’s because these characters are so different than Liam and Sam, Riley and Connor, Allie and Aiden, Beth and Ryan. Maybe it’s because I am completely starting over with nothing to rely on except myself and my brain and my heart and soul that breathes for this and I don’t want to crush any of it because all of this means the world.

Too much?

Probably.

But it’s still there.

Some serious pressure and stuff.

And it is one hundred percent all coming from me.

And it sucks.

I don’t want to get it wrong.

Because I feel like this book – and the next three after it – can be amazing.

A-M-A-Z-I-N-G

I want to be able to say they WILL be amazing.

They ARE amazing.

I want and need to say that, because these characters, their love stories, they are amazing … and I want you, the readers, to feel that way right along with me.

You deserve the story that is in my head, my heart, my freaking soul.

You deserve to read that story, to be a part of it, to live it. And hopefully love it!

And my characters deserve it to.

I deserve it.

So, OBVIOUSLY, this book is taking me a lot longer to write than I imagined. A lot longer than any of my previous books. I had hoped that it would be out living and breathing in the world by late Spring, early Summer … and now … I will just be happy if I have the first draft done by then. Because then comes the edits, edits, and more edits. So a an approximate date? I’m not sure.

2018? DEFINITELY.

Fall? PROBABLY.

Late Summer? MIRACLE????

But I DO have a cover … there is THAT.

I have a Jax and a Sky.

I have a Jenks and a Livvie.

I have a Reed and an Emma.

I have a Knox and a Rina/Cat.

And I also have tons of material for ALL the books. That’s something. Because when I finally get everything together – mostly myself – I am hoping that it just flows like it normally does.

But for right now, with tears in my eyes (seriously … stupid freaking tears), I need to say that I am sorry.

Sorry for delaying this book.

Sorry for taking so long writing it.

Sorry for all this doubt shit.

Sorry for rambling on and on and on and on and on and on …

But I need Jax and Sky’s story to be the BEST that it can be. And I need you all to KNOW that.

Like I said … YOU deserve it, I deserve it, JAX, SKY, JENKS, LIVVIE, REED, EMMA, KNOX, & RINA deserve it.

I will try and keep you posted a lot more than I have about this book and how it’s going. More than I ever have for any of the other books. Because you definitely deserve that.

And starting now, like I said above before I went and on and on and on and on, I am releasing the first chapter of Jax and Sky’s story.  And unlike the other books where I waited until I was almost done or completely done with writing before I started releasing teasers, I am going to start doing that now as well. A little something for bearing with me through all of this. A little something to show you that Jax and Sky are worth that wait … AND MAYBE I will throw in some teasers of the other couples and their books as well. Because like I said … I have a LOT of material for all of the rest of the books as well.

I am so thankful for you guys and the love you have shown me and my books.

I hope you continue to do so with this next series.

Seriously … these characters and their stories – they are SO worth it.

And I hope more than anything that you’ll be finding out for yourselves soon.

Until then enjoy the sneak peek of Jax and Sky’s story … and keep checking back or around (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook) for all the new teasers I will be releasing soon!

Happy Reading Everyone!

Tara