Halfway Through Chaotic Beauty …


It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything on here, but that’s actually a good thing. It’s because I have been busy writing Connor and Riley’s story! And what a story they have. I am absolutely in love with writing their book.

For this book I get to explore both Connor and Riley in a lot of different situations, but I also get to explore a few other characters as well. The dynamics of this group of friends and family … I really hope that you all continue on with this series because I have to tell you – the best is yet to come.

I am a bit more than halfway through writing Connor and Riley’s story. And with that also comes a pretty good foundation outline for both Aiden and Ryan’s stories as well. The stories that those two have to tell … It’s going to be hard. It’s going to be difficult. But it’s going to be so worth it. I just know it. It’s nothing like what Sam went through with her thoughts and feelings about her past with Aiden. Of being worried that Liam would hurt her and leave. About not trusting.

It’s nothing like what Riley’s was/is going through either. Or what Connor went/is going through.

Aiden and Ryan … their hurts run deep on a physical level, on an emotion level – things really have happened to them to make them who they are … and the women they end up with … they too have deep, deep scars – they all either have physical things, sad things, dirty things, long lingering things that have happened to them …
Where Sam and Liam were on the light side of drama and  hurts – I know without a doubt that Aiden’s and Ryan’s stories are much darker. Ryan’s story **** is definitely the darkest.
But I really don’t want to give anything away so I am going to stop now.

Anyway …

So yeah, I am a bit more than halfway through writing Chaotic Beauty and wow am I going crazy.

I’ve shed tears already on numerous occasions, I’ve been mad, disappointed, and downright confused at/with both Connor and Riley AND myself …
I’ve second guessed myself a million times … I’ve deleted whole scenes and even “chapters” … I’ve cut and changed things that made me frustrated and mad with myself but I knew I had to do it …

I’ve pretty much gone back to either being a raving b*tch who doesn’t want to be bothered, talked to, or distracted,  or a silent loner who closes herself off so nobody has the option to make me the raving b*tch… That’s honestly what you get with/from me when I write.

I’ve closed myself off for hours and hours on end and it’s been like this for a few weeks now …
It’s awful.

And when I have to come out of my writing cave when I don’t want to … Oh, man it’s not a pretty thing.

I really haven’t been able to balance myself yet between both worlds. I really haven’t.

And if that wasn’t bad enough I have a lot of personal stuff going on right now that I actually DO have to pay attention to – so I am constantly being pulled out of my writing bubble when I don’t want to be … Yes, definitely not good.

Everything lately feels like it’s in disarray – and I hate it.

But I am muddling through it.

I guess welcome to the life of a writer?

And speaking some more of writing I have to get back to it.
I need to keep pace with my target of having this book out into your hands and mine by late November. But I will try and keep you better posted on it! If you follow me on Twitter you will probably know before anyone else what is going on because it seems that’s the only thing besides reading and writing I am able to keep up with lately! Go figure!

But anyway I’m out of here.

Check back soon for more info!